maybe someday i'll be better at this...

Once again, I've been lacking the inspiration to write in this blog lately. I'm not sure why...lack of topic to write about... maybe, or am I really just too lazy to sit down and write?

I think part of my issue is that I'm not at school, so I'm not as stressed out - in fact, this job does not come with a lot of stress at all....something I am definitely not used to. Whenever I get super stressed out I use writing as a way to destress and take a break from whatever is bothering me, so that I can go back and focus on the thing that is stressing me out with a fresh start.

But, I am starting my first ever graduate class next week, and I am positive that I will become the person I am more used to.

Speaking of my graduate class, this is the first time I've been nervous in MONTHS. I am seriously terrified that I am making a huge mistake trying to take this class. Not only is this the first time I've been paying for my education completely on my own (Thank you Brandeis for not having a master's program that interests me even slightly...), but I'm going to be at Salem State, not Simmons, and that definitely terrifies me. I felt comfortable the first time I walked onto Simmons' campus...I've never even been to Salem State. I knew when I got accepted to Simmons that I had the capacity to do the work and strive at what I loved, Communications. But now, I'm just taking a graduate class without having to apply to the program yet, and without having to take the GMATS which will prove eventually if I can even get into a graduate program ANYWHERE. What if I'm not meant to go to grad school, or what if I'm not meant to get an MBA? Am I wasting my time, effort and money on something that I can never achieve? I guess I just need to wait and see how this whole thing plays out.